a conversation…

this conversation actually happened on saturday at work:

(phone rings…)

me (in an overly chipper manner)(…i always accidentally yell when i answer the phone at work…): HI! waikiki beach tanning, this is brooke.

man: do you guys do waxing?

me: well, no. we are a tanning booth that just…tans? but i know the place next door to us does!

man: what type of waxing do they do?

me: the…good kind? i think they wax eyebrows and lips and chins and…faces?

man: do they do manscaping? like, brazilians?

me: (not masking my disgust) no…

man: i’m in need of a good one.

me: oh. well. right. perhaps in draper…or at a spa…or, somewhere?

man: that’s far! i am actually sitting in the bus outside of your salon right now…

(look up and see decrepit 80-year-old man in a large school bus enthusiastically waving at me…i slowly raise my hand and wave back and try to not. visualize. anything.)

me: oh, wow! hi! waving! at me! it’s you! waving!

man: yes. it is.

me: …

man: well, i better keep trying. it’s urgent, you know what i mean? (laughing) bye, honey.

me: …

puking, puking, PUKING! why do these things always happen to me?!

2 responses

  1. your dad is thoroughly freaked out. If you see a man hiding behind some bushes outside your work, don’t be alarmed, it’s just your dad. Heavens child, why does the weird stuff always happen to you?

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