fridate (or where i get de-feminized).

today when jeff picked me up for our little fridate and told me that we’d be cooking, my heart stopped. “crap! my lack of domestic goodness will be exploited!” …i said out loud. or rather in my head. quietly. but seriously. i am kind of a domestic flop. ask me about the time i microwaved toaster strudel? or mixed up salt for sugar? or burnt an entire batch of brownies? ugh.

when we got back to his place and started in the kitchen, it was quite apparent that i was useless. i didn’t know canola oil from vegetable oil, initially used the wrong end of the knife to cut carrots (ow! my palm!), and couldn’t decide what temperature to put the water at to bring it to a boil.

also my hips must have grown 4,563 inches over night? i kept bumping into everything and everyone? birthing hips, ready for action?

eventually jeff caught on and kicked me out of the kitchen entirely. it was sort of, really de-femininzing…but i have huge hips so it basically equals out, essentially?

he ended up whipping up some delicious japanese (yes, japanese; he likes to use any opportunity to showcase his knowledge of the japanese culture…even if it risks sounding pretentious: it’s pronounced kar-e-o-KAY, not karao-key…) chicken curry and rice and started talking about how he has a new sparked interest in sewing? …i think his hips have grown, too.

we ended the night at the dollar theater ($2 for tickets and $10.50 for treats?!) watching ‘chronicle’ where i kept gasping and ‘OH MY GOSH!’-ing because it was so thrilling…and also because i kept rubbing arms and side-glancing  the guy sitting right next to me…i just felt like he needed it, or something.

p.s. am i the only one getting all crazy-fan over the prospect of taylor swift and zac efron together? did you see their interview on ellen together? i mean, come on! america’s favorite couple. right? also when did he get attractive? also who is buying their tickets 345 days early for the lucky one? …with jeff’s recent hip-growth i don’t think i’ll have to put up much of a fight to convince him to go…


3 responses

  1. that whole karaoke pronunciation just sounded like hermione from harry potter. literally. she was telling me the correct way to pronounce the word.

  2. i try to tell my mom that baking totally counts as cooking, but i fail at baking 99.67% of the time, too. boys that cook win. elso, there was no reading this post and not commenting when you mentioned tswizzle and zac. lilly collins, you’re no match for the swift. duet on her next album pleaseeee!?

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